RT 35 Done!

Taxi was way too early but not to worry I pulled on some trousers and swallowed my pills and headed off. Didn't have to wait too long when I got there, even though i was about 40 mins early. Scouse tech came out and took me in for my last one..Thankfully uneventful, and thats it.

They let me keep the mask, after cutting of the metal fastners which can be reused. And I gave Scouse tech a hug for all her help, then went off to see the doc.

Got some better drugs for the oral candida, more lidocaine and thats it. I still have to have weekly controle meetings for the next couple of weeks, to make sure the after effects are under control and to give me diet suppliments or drugs as needed but thats it! I'm done.

I feel quite battered and beat up, and very tired and sore but very very pleased its finally over.


Time to heal and let things settle down to normal.

RT 34......1 to go...just 1. phew.

Penultimate one done, taxi arrived ok this time and got there no problem. Machine broke down again on last part of the zap but was quickly fixed and done.
Scouse tech again was commenting on how well I am holding up and looking after such a long course of treatment. No burns, no major weight loss etc. But the tongue thing is still a problem, going to try get a pic of that today if I can get stoned enough to not feel the pain when I stick it out :D

Scouse tech also warned me to be in no rush to return to work in 3 weeks as I may well have effects from the treatment lating for 4 or more weeks. Mainly tiredness, but I am sure I can cope with that, so long as my tongue is working and I am able to talk I can give lectures. Its not as if they actually make me do any physical work :D

Dietician appointment also went ok, I have lost a bit more weight this week, which I was expecting due to the increase in mouth pain and inability to eat large chunks of food. But overall still well within the limits. Amazingly, my muscle strength is still improving. I assume its all the excercise we've been doing for packing and hauling for the move. Either way..its all good news as far as my body is concerend.

Looking forward to the last one tomorrow, then chillin' for a few weeks. I still have to do some controle appointments in Tilburg for a couple of weeks until the RT effects have worn off, but at least there's no more daily disruption in my life next week.

I had my 1st real experience of what going without morphine would be like since I took my dose early yesterday and didn't take any in the evening. As a result of a late night and a long sleep till 12ish today, I basically woke up with no painkillers in my system, they had worn off.

I.
Never.
Want.
To.
Do.
That.
AGAIN.

With the morphine, my mouth and tongue is sore, without it, I have a prety fair idea of what its like to walk around with a red hot poker in your mouth. Soon as I woke up I ran to the bathroom to douse my mouth with lidocaine then get some drugs in me before that wore off.
A combination of 1 blue (no its not viagra), 1 red, 2 white and 1 red and white pills was hastily swalloed and 15mins later I was able to deal with it a bit better.
Roll on tomorrow...or rather roll on 8pm when I can take more morphine ;)

rt33 2 to go

Taxi issues were eventually resolved and I was taken in a minibus and back..Seems my taxi did come at 7-40 but I must have been in the shower and missed him. We didn't hear the bell, so perhaps we need to invest in a better one.

When we did get to the clinic though I had a long wait as the machines, or rather the computers that control the machines had broken down, and quite a queue built up before I was called in.

Seems they had tried to call me to find out where I was and had not got my message that I was held up again...no worries I left my mobile number for them.

Depite double doses of morphine I am in mega pain still, my tongue and jaw are screaming at me and there seems to be little relief. I am tired as hell from the lack of sleep last night though so I going to try to stay awake today and get an early and hopefully long sleep tonight.

Was sad to hear that the taxi company who have been driving me are closing down. I was chatting with my driver yesterday (the one I missed this morning) who was telling me he was due to have his contract renewal interview yesterday and he was hopful he would get his permanant contract after 2 years of 1 year contracts..Sadly he was told he and all the others were being laid off in Sept. Quite a blow for him and the others who by and large have been nice to spend time with. I hope they all get new jobs soon. At least Taxi drivers are always in demand...just not for companies that specialise in transporting hospital patients.

Bahhh

More taxi issues, not sure if they never showed up or if they came too early when I was still in the shower, but either way have missed todays appointment. I have called in and told the clinic. I am waiting to hear from the cab company what the problem was/is and if they can't supply another cab I'll walk down to the train station and make my own way in.

Feeling very rough today, was doing a lot of talking last night and it really killed my tongue, even double doses of morphine are not having much impact on the pain levels today. So been using lidocaine to ease it and am not talking today if I can avoid it.

Bizzarly, despite the double dose of Oxycontin, I could not sleep last night, and in total have only had about 10 mins snooze, no where near enough, I'll have to have a few hours nap when I finally get back from the appointment and try to regulate my hours.

Don't want to miss this appointment, just because we're so close to the end and Friday is the big day, I won't risk having that postponed to Monday just to make sure I get the full 35 fractions.

3 more..just 3 more I can hold out for that, not sure there's going to be much left of my tongue after 3 more but it can heal after Friday.

RT32 3 to go

After the drama of yesterday it was a relief to have a totally uneventful drive to Tilburg for todays zapping which was equally uneventful.

Only issue with the early morning ones is having to get up very early to get ready which of course increases the tiredness when I return, but at least I have the day to myself now.

Pain levels are still quite high, have taken a single dose of my Oxycontin this morning, since I had one before bed at 1am, and it won't have worn off yet, but planning a double dose tonight around 6. I also need to pick up some more lidocaine to help with the tongue problems which are the main source of pain.

Eating is also becoming more difficult, as I can only open my mouth a couple of cm now, just enough to get a fork in :(. But spag bol and other reasonable softish/small foods are going in and so long as I don't have to chew too hard swallowing is still not a problem. Also is just as well I like pea and ham soup :D

3 days to go...so close now just want to limp over the finish line, dope myself up on the morphine for a week and veg out.

RT31 4 to go

Well, karma is not on my side today... The Taxi didn't turn up, it seems they made an error checking it in, and when I tried to call to sort it out, they used a premium rate number which very quickly used up all my credits and left me scrambling to arrange a new taxi.

Fortunatly the verbeeten are used to such things, so long as you call to let them know you will be late they juggle things around.

Eventually the taxi firm sorted out another taxi firm to come collect me and I was taken there on the meter...wow. 54 euros each way, and he actually forgot to include the waiting time...so probably around 110euros normally. Fortunaly, though they did at 1st ask me to pay and claim back, they managed to arrange for the normal taxi firm to be billed for the amount.

Once I actually got there, I was straight in and RT31 was uneventful....4 left. Lets hope the side effects won't get much worse, but I am going to give some serious thought to doubling the morphine as my tongue is just agony still.
we'll see how I manage after food.

Agony

Well so much for thinking that I had got through the worst of the side effects, this weekend my mouth has been agony, just absolute agony, feels like I have an infection in my jaw at the back, though its more likely to just be radiation induced swelling and soreness.

Aside from pain it has a big impact on my eating ability as my mouth is opening less and less each day. I have been doing my stretching exercise with my finger and thumb to push it open further, but man....oh it does hurt. But..I am still eating, soft foods at least, and after a short period of constipation, I took the meds with the required result a few hours later...so my insides are least are coping.

Also had a few times of waking up screaming in pain as my tongue was either bitten or dragged along my teeth in my sleep. The nasty sore on there is getting bigger after a brief period of healing and is very painful, reaching up to the top of my tongue now. I may have to consider doubling my morphine dose as per the doctors suggestion if this gets beyond tolorable.

Last week of RT this week, and I'll be heading off for todays dose a little later. In the meantime am keeping busy as best I can with the house move/organising rooms, doing what I can before tiredness kicks in.

I must admit I was pleased by how much I was able to do on the actual move day, loading and unloading all day keeping up with our friends, who were helping us move. But next day I was like a wet sack of sand....Mind you, I would have felt that way even before the cancer after shifting so much of our accumulated crap :D